The old canard about the husband who had mixed emotions when he saw his mother-in-law driving his new Cadillac over a cliff, certainly did not give me a chuckle. I had a perfectly fine mother-in law in the form or the late Eneth Mary  Miller. She was a quiet and kindly white haired lady of 88 when she demised in 1979     .

She told me her life had been in thirds: in the first third ( born in Lewiston, Shasta County) she was single and a nurse in San Francisco, in the second third she was married to John Miller who ran a hardware store in Chico…and then spent the final third as his widow. I never heard an unkind word about the lady from the day I began courting her daughter back in 1942 when she, the daughter, first lit up Lincoln Street Elementary. You might think a kindly disposition was hardly tantamount to sainthood, but when many a marriage has gone on the rocks via interference of mother-laws-running amuck, you might appreciate this virtue.

John became a Montgomery Ward store manager when he moved his wife and 3 daughters to Red Bluff during pre war 1939. In those days, the store was located in the 800 block of Main, site of the current Peking Restaurant. The store’s large basement was home to the hardware department which John ran with a steady hand. Eneth set up housekeeping on Lincoln, near the school, then on Monroe and finally on Madison. Each home was always immaculate. But what made her an outstanding wife, mother and mother-in-law?

She was neither a busy body nor social climber. She gave good advice to her daughters i.e. “You don’t have to do what I say, but someday you might find my advice of use.” And her advice to the young spilled over to her youngest child, JoAnn, who coined the phrase, while admonishing her own children, “You can make it a good day or a bad day…it is entirely up to you!”

Perhaps heaping praise upon one’s late mother-in-law is not as exciting as, say, recounting the accomplishments of local movers and shakers of in our fair city, but, perhaps there is a reader or two who might consider their own mother-in-law…and compare with the kindly and considerate Eneth Mary Miller.

When I was working long hours at the meat plant back in the 70’s, I would dash home for dinner before returning for an evening stint getting out the loads heading for Ess Eff.  Mrs. Miller might be reading the paper in our living room while I tried to get a few minutes nap before said dinner. I once awoke to find her holding the newspaper primly in her lap. When her daughter observed her sitting motionless, she asked if she was alright. She replied, “I did not want to rattle the papers while Robert was napping.”

What a mother-in-law!

This entry was posted on Friday, July 30th, 2010 at 6:24 am and is filed under Passing Parade. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.